Jokes for Kids: Jokes are something that children like very much. Whether it is telling jokes or listening to jokes, children love jokes. But finding clean, easy, and family-friendly jokes for kids can be difficult.
If you are looking for funny jokes for kids, then here are 150 funny kids jokes that are clean and family-friendly! Kids will love these jokes.
Jokes for Kids
1. “What does a cloud wear under his raincoat?”
Thunderwear.
2. “What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back?“
A stick.
3. “What did the traffic light say to the car?“
Don’t look. I’m about to change.
4. “Two pickles fell out of a jar onto the floor. What did one say to the other?“
Dill with it.
5. “What did the fisherman say to the magician?“
Pick a cod, any cod.
6. “Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?”
Because she was stuffed.
7. “What did the snowman say to the other snowman?”
Do you smell carrots?
8. “What do you call a little legume?”
Tinybean.
9. “Why can’t Cinderella play soccer?”
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
10. “Why did the computer go to the dentist?“
It had a blue tooth.
11. “Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?“
She will Let It Go.
12. “Why did the bicycle fall over?“
It was two tired.
13. “Did you hear about the kidnapping in the park?”
They woke him up.
14. “How do all the oceans say hello to each other?”
They wave!
15. “How does a cow do math?“
With a cow-culator!
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16. “What did one wall say to the other wall?”
I’ll meet you at the corner!
17. “What do you get when you cross a turtle with a porcupine?“
A slowpoke.
18. “What do you call a bear with no teeth?”
A gummy bear!
19. “Why is a baseball stadium always cool?“
It is full of fans.
20. “What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?”
Nacho cheese!
21. “Why did the cell phone get glasses?“
Because she lost all her contacts.
22. “Where do cows go for entertainment?”
To the moo-vies!
23. “What do you call an alligator in a vest?“
An investigator!
24. “What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!”
25. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Cows go. Cows go who?
No, cows go MOO!
Funny Clean Jokes
26. “Why is there a fence around a cemetery?”
People are dying to get in.
27. “What animal needs to wear a wig?
A bald eagle!”
28. “What music frightens balloons?“
Pop music.
29. What do you call a fly without wings?
A walk!”
30. “What time is it when the clock strikes 13?“
Time to get a new clock.
31. “What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?“
A tuba toothpaste.
32. “How does a cucumber become a pickle?“
It goes through a jarring experience.
33. “Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?
Because she wanted to go to high school.”
34. “What did one toilet say to the other?“
You look a bit flushed.
35. “What do you call a dog magician?“
A labracadabrador.
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36. “What do you think of that new diner on the moon?
Food was good, but there really wasn’t much atmosphere.”
37. “Where would you find an elephant?“
The same place you lost her.
38. “Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because the chicken wasn’t born yet.”
39. “What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?“
The same middle name.
40. “What do you call a pig that knows karate?”
A pork chop!
41. “Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?”
In case he got a hole in one.
42. “Why are ghosts bad liars?”
“Because you can see right through them!”
43. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
A little old lady?
A little old lady who?
I didn’t know you could yodel!
44. “How does Darth Vader like his toast?“
On the dark side.
45. “Why do bees have sticky hair?”
Because they use honey combs!
46. “What room doesn’t have doors?“
A mushroom.
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47. “What did the left eye say to the right eye?”
Between us, something smells!
48. “What do you say when you lose a Wii game?“
I want a Wii-match.
49. “Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?“
A: To get to the bottom!
50. “Why can’t Elsa from Frozen have a balloon?“
Because she will “let it go, let it go.”
Funny Jokes for Kids
51. “How do you get a squirrel to like you?“
Act like a nut.
52. “What did the policeman say to his belly button?“
You’re under a vest.
53. “Why is Peter Pan always flying?“
Because he never lands.
54. “How do you make a tissue dance?”
Put a little boogie in it.
55. “What do you call two birds in love?“
Tweethearts
56. “How does a scientist freshen her breath?“
With experi-mints.
57. “How are false teeth like stars?“
They come out at night.
58. “Why was the broom late?“
It over-swept.
59. “Which is the longest word in the dictionary?“
“Smiles,” because there are miles between each “s.”
60. “What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire “
Frostbite!
61. “What stays in a corner and travels all over the world?“
A stamp.
62. “What has four wheels and flies?”
A garbage truck!
63. “Why did the man run around his bed?”
Because he was trying to catch up on his sleep!
64. “Why did the math book look so sad?”
Because it had so many problems!
65. “What building in your town has the most stories?“
The public library.
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66. “What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?“
Finding half a worm.
67. “How did the mobile phone propose to his girlfriend?”
He gave her a ring.
68. “What’s the most popular video game at the bread bakery?“
Knead for Speed.
69. “Why is Santa good at karate?“
He has a black belt.
70. “Where do werewolves buy Christmas gifts?“
Beast Buy.
71. “What did the snowflake say to the road?”
Let’s stick together.
72. Why did the turkey join a band?
So he could use his drumsticks.
73. “Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?“
Of course! The Empire State Building can’t jump!
74. “If April showers bring Mayflowers, what do Mayflowers bring?“
Pilgrims!
75. “What do you call a sleeping bull?”
A bulldozer!
Hilarious Jokes for Kids
76. “Did you hear the joke about the roof?“
A: Never mind, it’s over your head.
77. “What did the stamp say to the envelope?”
Stick with me and we’ll go places together.
78. Q: “What race is never run?”
A swimming race.
79. “Why did the little boy throw his clock out the window?”
Because he wanted to see time fly.
80. “What did the zero say to the eight?”
Nice belt!
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81. “Why do sharks swim in saltwater?”
Because pepper water makes them sneeze!
82. “Why did the police play baseball?”
He wanted to get a catch!
83. “What did the microwave say to the other microwave?”
Is it just me? Or is it really hot in here?
84. “Where do you find a dog with no legs?”
Right where you left him!
85. “What is a computer’s favorite snack?“
Computer chips.
86. “What did one volcano say to the other?“
I lava you.
87. “How do we know that the ocean is friendly?“
It waves.
88. “What is a tornado’s favorite game to play?“
Twister.
89. “How does the moon cut his hair?“
Eclipse it.
90. “How do you talk to a giant?“
Use big words.
91. “What animal is always at a baseball game?“
A bat.
92. “What falls in winter but never gets hurt?“
Snow.
93. “What has two legs but can’t walk?”
A pair of pants.
94. “How does a train eat?”
It goes chew chew.
95. “Do you know how many famous men and women were born on your birthday?”
None, only babies.
96. “Where do fish keep their money?”
In the river bank!
97. “Why did the gum cross the road?”
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot!
98. “What is brown and sticky?”
A stick!
99. “Why did the picture go to jail?”
It was framed!
100. “What happens if it rains cats and dogs?“
A: You need to watch for poodles.
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Funny Random Jokes for Kids
101. “How do you know if there’s an elephant under your bed?”
Your head hits the ceiling!
102. “Why are elephants so wrinkled?”
Because they take too long to iron!
103. “Why did the student eat his homework?”
Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake!
104. “What is the witch’s favorite school subject?“
Spelling!
105. “What did the Dalmatian say after lunch?“
That hit the spot.
106. “Why did the kid cross the playground?“
To get to the other slide.
107. “What do you call a droid that takes the long way around?“
R2 detour.
108. “Why did the cookie go to the hospital?“
Because he felt crummy.
109. “Why did the little girl hit her birthday cake with a hammer?”
It was a pound cake.
110. “What did the marlin say to the swordfish?“
You’re looking sharp.
111. “How do you keep an elephant from charging?”
Take away her credit card!
112. “Why did the elephant paint himself different colors?”
So he could hide in the crayon box!
113. “How can you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator?“
By the footprints in the butter!
114. “What is the difference between elephants and grapes?”
Grapes are purple.
115. “What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming?”
“Here come the elephants!”
116. “Why are fish so smart?“
Because they live in schools.
117. “How do snails fight?“
They slug it out.
118. What is a deer with no eyes called?
<shrugs> No “eye-deer” (idea)
119. “What’s a snake’s favorite subject?”
Hiss-tory.
120. “How does a squid go into battle?“
Well armed.
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121. “What can you catch but not throw?”
A cold!
122. “What has hands but can’t clap?”
A clock!
123. “What do you call a dog that can tell time?”
A watch dog!
124. “Why was the baby strawberry crying?“
Because her mom and dad were in a jam.
125. “What did the little corn say to the mama corn?“
Where is pop corn?
Popular Jokes for Kids
126. “Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long?“
Because then it would be a foot.
127. “Why did they quit giving tests at the zoo?“
Because it was full of cheetahs
128. “Why is a bad joke like a pencil?“
Because it has no point
129. “What do you call a pig that knows karate?“
a pork chop!
130. “What animal needs to wear a wig?“
A bald eagle!
131. “Why can’t you trust the king of the jungle?“
Because he’s always lion.
132. “Why did the firefly get bad grades in school?“
He wasn’t very bright.
133. “What did one hat say to the other?
Stay here, I’m going on ahead. (going on a head)”
134. “Why didn’t the quarter roll down the hill with the nickel?
Because it had more cents.”
135. “What is brown, hairy, and wears sunglasses?”
A cool coconut.
136. “Where do polar bears keep their money?“
A: A snow bank.
137. “What room can no one enter?“
A: A mushroom
138. “What side of a turkey has the most feathers?”
The outside!
139. “Why wouldn’t the shrimp share his treasure?”
A: Because he was a little shellfish.
140. “What do you call a fake noodle?”
An impasta!
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141. “How do you make a lemon drop?“
Just let it fall.
142. “Why does a seagull fly over the sea?“
Because if it flew over the bay, it would be a baygull.
143. “What kind of water can’t freeze?“
Hot water.
144. “Why did the teacher put on sunglasses?”
Because her students were so bright!
145. “Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Howard.
Howard who?
Howard you like a bear hug! (go for a big hug)“
146. “Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Sing.
Sing who?
Whooo-ooo-ooo!“
147. “Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Water.Water who?
Water you doing in my house?!?“
148. “Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Amish.
Amish who?
Awe, I miss you too.“
149. “Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Dishes.
Dishes who?
Dishes a nice place you got here.“
150. “Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Hike.
Hike who?
I didn’t know you liked Japanese poetry!“
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